Sharing My Co-Active Coach Certification Journey

Wow, it’s poignant to read about wanting to share my beautiful mess last July.

My life did get messier in 2019 and I haven’t shared any messiness since then.

Did I fail?

No. It’s a new muscle I’m trying to grow, so I’m holding myself with gentleness and still accountable. Here I am pushing to flex that muscle again. I know I will get better with practice, over time.

What’s In The Way?
I’m still figuring out the line between public vulnerability and over-sharing with people (thank you, Brené Brown for thinking and writing about this - you’ll forever be one of my heroes!). I’m not looking to offer a neat package of growth and I’m also not looking to create pity or crisis around me. I want to be who I am, even when I’m online - social media is a tough space. I don’t want to have a ‘personal brand’ AND I want to find and build community. I want the social connection without my humanity being turned into media for consumption.

What’s Possible? Why Is This Important To Me?
My urge to share hasn’t gone away. I’ve been trying to understand why the impulse to share is so strong. My best guess right now is a need for authentic connection - as a human, a woman, a person of color, and especially as a business owner.

I don’t want to perform perfection as a business owner, in order to have perceived expertise and authority. Coaches are human first - we make mistakes, just like our clients. We create this space in our coaching sessions, and I want being human normalized in business too.

My Word of Intention for 2020

How Do I Want To ‘Be’?
It aligns with my 2020 intention of Surrender. Surrender to the messiness, the imperfection, the emotions, and to my community. Let whatever comes up, come up. I want to be radically transparent, in a way that serves all of us.

How Do I Want to ‘Do’?
I’m going to embody and practice this as I go through my Co-Active Coach Certification program between Feb - July 2020. I will be writing about what I’m feeling and learning (including my struggles) each week.

In addition to pushing my own learning, I want to question where I as a coach (just like every other way of being) might be perpetuating systems of oppression. If I have bandwidth, I’ll also be writing about more of my experiences, reflections and insights beyond the certification program.

For clients, I hope to pull back the curtain on coaching, so you can understand what I as a coach might be feeling, doing, and thinking about when they are coaching you. For coaches, I hope this creates another space for even more of the openness, questions, and discussion that are already present in our field.

For myself, I hope this helps me find the boundary that works for me as a business owner, grows my muscle of sharing into a normal routine action, and creates connection to others.

Accountability
What do you think about this? What questions do you have? I’d especially love to hear from people that are considering coaching or becoming coaches. Comment below or message me privately, whichever feels most comfortable to you.